Yesterday was a bad, awful day horrible day. First we got news about Hanna that we didn't want to hear. Nothing really bad, just nothing good. I'm sure my sister will post about it if she hasn't already. If she doesn't I'll do another post about it later.
What I want to do for this moment is tell you about a man who has left this world. None of you knew him but your lives have been touched by him if you read here. Every time I smart off and you laugh, every time I take on a challenge and tell you about it, every time i do something kind and share it, there's one person who inspired my belief in myself to do so.
Many years ago I started a yahoo group for people who were married, NOT looking to cheat, just looking to hang out. I was married at the time and very lonely, new to the internet and hoped to just find people who understood I was married to a creep.
I figured there had to be others out there as well. There were, ALOT of them.
Shortly after opening the group, "Wolfie" as we shall call him, entered my life. Now understand, Wolfie was a biker type, and I do mean the real deal, not the drugged out freaks you think of as bikers. He had a code he lived by and that included treating people the best he could, being a true friend and always being kind. When he joined the group he signed his posts with a cool "Lonewolf". I'm sure he was mortified when i shortened it and started calling him Wolfie lol. He may have even complained but it was too late, it stuck. He was Wolfie and that was that. He gave in and started signing his name that way.
Wolfie was so much fun. He'd say something sly and "aaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrroooooooooo" afterwards because he thought that was funny. He made us "breakfast" in the group every morning. All pretend of course but he made it special in a way by having paid attention to what the regulars liked. Coffee was the staple, had to have it. He made Miss C her sausage gravy, Miss K her whatever she was onto wanting that particular month and he made me waffles or tried to tempt me with sausage biscuits. He liked to do that the most when he knew i was dieting lol.
We'd talk about tying pretty pink bows in his fur and knotting his tail.....oh lord the things we threatened to do to him when he was bad lol. He took it all in stride and always had a comeback. There was no telling what he'd say.
Because i was the group owner, I had to deal with problem members sometimes. He was quite protective of me and the other ladies. If something needed handling he was there for guidance and support. When things were bad for me at home, he'd call to check on me. Through the divorce he was literally a rock. Where others were supportive, he was truly someone who wanted nothing more than my happiness. When i didn't have enough money for Christmas one year, he helped me. When i needed to laugh, he was more than willing to put a smile on my face. When something went right he refused to let me do anything less than celebrate my geniousness in having tried to do it in the first place. He truly, honestly believed in me and in who he knew i could be. I thought he was giving too much credit but the one time i told him that, he made it clear i shouldn't ever repeat it lol.
He cussed me when i introduced him to Pogo and he got addicted to it too. He whined like a girl when women in the group or pogo just didn't get that he was a flirt but a HARMLESS one lol. I can't tell you how many girls were more than willing to drop their panties, but he didn't want that. He liked a touch of class in women. That usually meant respecting his marriage and not trying to be more than an online friend.
He just wanted to joke around and cut loose in a safe venue. Now, i'm not saying he was a saint, he wasn't, but those aren't my stories to tell.
Yesterday, i found out that Wolfie died. I don't know how or why he was taken from us. I never will. One of the friends could call the family to express condolences i'm sure but none of us would ever be that disrespectful to impose on their grief. I'm sure Wolfie wouldn't have wanted us to be sad either. He'd tell us to knock off the crying or he'd bite us on the butt or something equally silly.
With him gone, there's one regret. I wanted just once to REALLY hug him and tell him what an impact his strength and his belief in me had on my life. I wanted him to know that his kindness and wonderful nature got me through far more than even he knew about And I never ever saw him face to face.
Don't discount the power of the Internet, you never know who's on the other side of the monitor, and used wisely, it will never hurt you to take a second to find out. You just might be someone's Wolfie.